God's Lovingkindness

Beautiful deck to enjoy.

I am amazed at God's lovingkindness in sending beautiful people to walk with me through my grief.

I was all set to seal my deck a couple weeks ago and a friend phoned to invite me on a bike ride. This turned into two friends voluntarily giving up their bike ride to instead help me with this large project. "More hands make fast work," they said, and they were so right. With God's great attention to detail, He not only sent two angels, but two who were experienced at sealing decks already this year!

(Just another example of God's great provision -- I could go on -- but I'd rather "2 John 12" with you!)

Those who have lost loved ones know the way of grief is a wild roller coaster. I'm slogging through some extreme emotional lows at times, processing all that I am missing. My husband was the sweetest person ever to me. He blessed me with his selfless love. He knew my thoughts and emotions so well, he could finish my sentences. I trusted him with all my heart and was completely safe with him. He was my favorite person in the whole wide world and I was his. It's so hard not to have this kind of intimacy any more...

After a particularly low string of days, I was soaking in the Psalms for comfort. I was reminded how King David certainly knew every raw emotion I was feeling. Words like anguish, agony, sorrow, aching and groaning peppered the Psalms he penned. Yet throughout the pain, his faith was steadfast as he trusted in the Lord's lovingkindness.

With his world falling down around him and even fearing for his life, David said:

But I have trusted in your lovingkindness,
My heart shall rejoice in your salvation.
I will sing to the Lord
For he has dealt bountifully with me. (Ps. 13:5-6, NASB)

I savored those verses. Yes, God has been amazingly loving and kind... He loves each one of us as if we were His favorite in the whole wide world. (He was the one who taught Ted to love that way.) No matter how rough this road is, this is not our home and these troubles are only temporary. We have a beautiful eternity to look forward to with our Lord -- what a gracious gift that is! That is something to rejoice in and sing about. I thought about how good God has been to me all my life. We have a history, it's solid and His love never changes.

Oh, Loving Lord, you have so graciously loved me and so abundantly blessed me. I will dwell in your lovingkindness every day through whatever comes my way. Whom shall I fear when you are the one in control? In this world we will have trouble, but you have overcome the world. (John 16:33 NIV)