I Sometimes Forget Good Friday

A Holy Moment in the Smokies

God loved us so much He gave His only son to be crucified to redeem us from our sins.

Why would we fear anything when His love for us is so real, so deep, so powerful? Why would we ever have difficulty letting go and asking that God's will be done, rather than our own? How can we, even for a moment, forget what He has done to show His love for us?

And yet, there are times I hold tightly to the things I want, the direction I desire, the goals I have in mind. When His answers seem too slow, I forget that it takes time to orchestrate all the right details into place. When I yearn for these things now, I forget that He sees all and there is a greater good down the road if I will be patient. When life is difficult or painful, I sometimes forget that I am in the crucible with Christ and He is doing His awesome work to mold me for His glory.

I was reading in 1 Kings 11 where God told Jereboam through Ahijah the prophet that He would give him 10 of the 12 kingdoms. If only he would follow the Lord's commands and walk in His ways, God would be with Jeroboam. "I will build you a dynasty as enduring as the one I built for David and I will give Israel to you," He said.

But that never did come to pass, because Jereboam built shrines to other gods and did all kinds of evil, and God could not do all that He wanted to do.

I have seen that so often in the stories of the Bible, and I know it happens in our lives, too. God cannot do all that He wants to do if we do not trust that His way is best, surrender our own agendas and walk by faith, following wholeheartedly after Him.

Oh, Awesome God, I do not want to ever forget what you've done for me. I love you and I trust you with my life. Show me where I might be slowing you down or resisting your plans. I want to abandon my agenda and follow yours with all my heart.

Unplug to Recharge

Serenity at St. Mary Lake in Glacier National Park

In today’s electronic age, it seems counter-productive to “unplug to recharge,” but I have found that “unplugging” is absolutely the best way to re-energize me!

Oh, yes, I get energy from people and I love to be social. The encouragement and support of friends  gives me great boosts of borrowed energy. During the stress and emotion of this past couple weeks, in fact, this has really lifted me. But to keep going and find peace and strength, I need to preserve enough time to “find the quiet.”

I find the quiet by reading the Word, soaking in its wisdom and journaling what I’m learning. I can also find it by taking a walk or a ride by myself. Sometimes I find it waiting in line or taking a few minutes to kick back and listen carefully to the One I need most to connect with. I wonder why I even let other things steal my quiet when my greatest need is to be with the Source of all power and true refreshing.

Amid multiple priorities and lots of people I’d like to spend time with, I’m always working at carefully protecting that quiet space. No matter what is happening – the more that is going on, the more I need it! Even in tiny and consistent increments, unplugging from the things of the world and going in to His presence does everything to recharge me. It is this “abiding on the Vine” that washes and revives me, nourishes and strengthens me, gives me direction and vision.

Upon returning from the quiet, I find I have much more to offer – serenity, wisdom, compassion, perspective, balance and creativity…things I would rather not live without!

How do you refresh and recharge? Where and when do you “find your quiet”?

Dear God, Grant me the serenity in pockets of quiet, the courage to fiercely guard that time and the wisdom to know when I need it!

"Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." (Jer. 33:3 NIV)

Testing My Roots

Just after my last post about growing "tenacious" roots, I have the opportunity, once again, to test those roots! Just how strong are they?

I had to bring Ted to the emergency room the very next day. He went through all kinds of medical testing throughout the day to determine the cause of his confusion and slurred speech. 

Long story short, his lymph nodes appear to be doing something new. Again, they wonder if his cancer is morphing. He had surgery this a.m. to give the doctors a lymph node to analyze and see what to do next. Ted's condition is stabilizing, yet there are numerous unknowns. All this will take time -- results don't often happen overnight -- so we need to be still and hold fast to those tenacious roots.

Long periods of waiting in the emergency room on Sunday made my mind return to the most traumatic times of last summer. Instead, I calmed myself and chose to concentrate on the peace beyond belief and the blanket of God's love surrounding me. I know that God is in control and good comes from His hand.

In his book Knowing God, J.I. Packer noted,

"As Christians grow stronger and are able to bear more, he [God] exercises them by the pressure of opposed and discouraging influences as they are able to bear -- not more (see the promise, 1 Cor. 10:13), but equally not less (see the admonition, Acts 14:22). Thus he builds our character, strengthens our faith, and prepares us to help others."

He gives us what we can bear -- not too much, not too little. He knows what we need and He is here with us through it all. I take comfort that the God of the universe -- who hung the stars, who created the glaciers that carved the magnificent mountains, who numbered the thicky curly hairs on Ted's head -- knows all that is going on inside of Ted's body, too. We can rest in His loving kindness.

Master of the universe, Creator, King and Lord, we feel safe with you. We trust you each step of the way.

Are You Growing Tenacious Roots?

Tenacious roots.

How can I ever forget what a miracle it was that Ted survived the wild roller coaster ride of medical issues last summer! Our church, friends and doctors are always amazed to see him looking so healthy and doing almost everything he did before the illness and surgeries. (Even his hair has grown back thicker and curlier than ever -- a visual reminder to all of what God has done.)

Remembering the toughest struggles, we had no other comfort than to send down tenacious roots, putting our total trust in God. We recall the unbelievable feeling of being wrapped in God's love, and fully relying on His loving guidance that made the next step possible. We were truly abiding in Him.

Ted and I would never want to repeat those events, but we also never want to forget them. We were lifted by the power of prayer in a rich and loving community of friends (thank you!) and the awesome way God worked as we held tightly to Him. Our perspective is so much richer, and we could not have gotten here another way. We want to steward this experience and never miss an opportunity to share that it is very possible to have God's perfect peace even when your world is spinning out of control around you.

Now whenever I struggle (usually with lesser things), I practice drawing on that same powerful strength, remembering that God is loving and strengthening me as powerfully as last summer.

I'll be sharing my journey of faith at the Women's Breakaway on April 14 in a breakout session called "Sending Down Deeper Roots." Please pray for me to let His words flow through me to minister to others who are hurting. 

Dear God, our Rock and Refuge in ALL of life, thank you for your faithfulness and truly amazing love. By the experience you gave us, help us help others to grow tenacious roots.

It was majestic in beauty, 
with its spreading boughs, 
for its roots went down 
to abundant waters. 
(Ezek. 31:7 NIV)

Who Are You Listening To?

Snowy creek in my neighborhood.

In 1 Kings 12, the newly crowned and wet-behind-the-ears King Rehoboam consults the elders who had served his father Solomon. They confer and give him wisdom on the issue, but he’s not sure he likes their answer. He then asks his peers for a second opinion. He favors the answer of his pals – more money, more power for him – so he acts on their advice.

If you’re not familiar with the outcome, read the story of how that one decision led to the division of the kingdom, and ultimately to the demise of the nation of Israel. Heavy!

So, who do we listen to these days?

I had to ask myself if I am seeking wisdom from the best sources. Do I allow current thinking to shape my mind and influence my decisions? Do I “go with the flow,” pick the most popular answer or the one that seems easiest or somehow beneficial to me? Or am I making a conscious effort to explore the issue and its possibilities, get in the Word, study God’s wisdom and character, seek His Truth and listen for what God would want me to do?

Where else can we get solid counsel? As many admired leaders have shared, the secret to success is to surround yourself with wise and positive people. I would much rather take advice from someone whose wisdom is tried-and-true, or even someone who has failed and learned, than someone who has only grandiose ideas.

What kinds of media, television or online sources do we allow to creep into the sacred ground of our sound minds? Are we walking with authentic role models with character and integrity? Or are the personalities we are letting in dragging us down, slowing us in a quagmire, draining our energy?

I am inspired and strengthened by the positive, uplifting music, prayers and promotions of my favorite Christian radio station. I am encouraged by the praises and perseverance of authentic and thoughtful friends striving to make a difference. I am blessed by those who passionately pursue the heart of God in their daily living.

With the ubiquitous influence of today’s media streams threatening to mold our values, shall we borrow the words of our faith-filled ancestor Joshua: “Choose carefully whom you will serve. As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!”

Lord, help me keep my ears tuned to you, my heart sensitive to your ways. Give me wisdom to navigate the distractions and to recognize wisdom and truth when I see it.

What’s your advice? How do you ensure you are getting godly counsel?

The Bookends of Life

On Saturday, my cousin was laid to rest. The age of 52 seems way too early to say goodbye, but God has a time for everything and He had called Tim home. The wonderful childhood memories of hide-and-seek, ice fishing with lots of cousins and uncles, watching The Wizard of Oz year after year, playing "button-button-who's-got-the-button?" and Christmas visits came alive again in my mind.

Oh, the joy of having cousins!

The joy of having cousins, the gift of fond memories, the difficult times that demand a deeper trust in God... I'm still counting my blessings -- in all things.

Then, that same afternoon, we learned we will be grandparents again! David was patiently showing us something on the computer when I realized the wallpaper pattern was taking the shape of an ultrasound image (squeals of delight)!! He and Debbie have been so eager to start this new chapter in their lives, and we are thrilled for them.

The hope in tomorrow, the excitement of new experiences, the sweetness of a baby... the blessings continue.

I try to grasp the brevity of life. Wasn't it only yesterday I was cozy with my cousins watching the Wicked Witch of the West? Now I'm looking back to a "Kansas" I can no longer enter and looking ahead to a place I cannot yet step into. I can only live for today, embracing the richness and having no regrets.

In one day I have experienced so many emotions.

Thank you, God, for the whole range of life. You have a time for everything... A time to be born and a time to die... a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance...(Eccl. 3).

Tell Yourself the Truth

In San Diego last summer.

It has been a busy season and I haven't posted since November. Ted had hip resurfacing surgery to take care of some bone spurs and I have been busy helping him heal. But I love to blog and am happy to take time today to share a few thoughts.

When I started to get feeling "behind" on everything I wanted to get done, I heard a little voice say, "You'll never catch up." When I lost a few pounds and they found their way back to me, I felt discouraged. When I couldn't resolve a tricky technical issue, I started to think, "I've lost it."

But in my morning devotion time (I've been reading the Bible chronologically), I began to read Proverbs, written by the legendarily wise Solomon. The first few chapters share valuable reasons to embrace wisdom, reminding us to cry out for insight, to look for it as for silver and treasure it as the finest of rubies. Let me paraphrase: we are to search for it actively, pursue it passionately and practice it purposefully!

I thought how silly it is that I pray for wisdom and then run around trusting in other things, like popular opinion or cultural pressures... "You'll never get it. You're not good enough." How I have been missing the boat to listen to the lies of the world instead of the wisdom that God has carefully been pouring into me. I resolved to treasure the words of the Lord like the finest of rubies. I determined to let His words build me up, instead of letting other things tear me down.

I began, once again, to practice being confident in the Lord. Whenever a negative thought would enter, I would push it out by telling myself the Truth (something my counselor husband has often reminded me). As a result, what a strong, productive and wonderfully positive day I had! (I even resolved my technical issue!) As I drove home from work, the Truth poured out from my radio to me as I heard Jason Gray sing, "Remind Me Who I Am."

Sometimes when the world starts to mold us, we need a little reminder of Whose voice our souls long to hear from.

Lord, if I'm your Beloved, help me believe it and live it! I belong to you, I'm the one you love. That will be enough for anything I need to get through today. I will search for your wisdom and tell myself the Truth. I am a new creation, being transformed every day.


Have you been telling yourself the Truth?