I had to bring Ted to the emergency room the very next day. He went through all kinds of medical testing throughout the day to determine the cause of his confusion and slurred speech.
Long story short, his lymph nodes appear to be doing something new. Again, they wonder if his cancer is morphing. He had surgery this a.m. to give the doctors a lymph node to analyze and see what to do next. Ted's condition is stabilizing, yet there are numerous unknowns. All this will take time -- results don't often happen overnight -- so we need to be still and hold fast to those tenacious roots.
Long periods of waiting in the emergency room on Sunday made my mind return to the most traumatic times of last summer. Instead, I calmed myself and chose to concentrate on the peace beyond belief and the blanket of God's love surrounding me. I know that God is in control and good comes from His hand.
In his book Knowing God, J.I. Packer noted,
"As Christians grow stronger and are able to bear more, he [God] exercises them by the pressure of opposed and discouraging influences as they are able to bear -- not more (see the promise, 1 Cor. 10:13), but equally not less (see the admonition, Acts 14:22). Thus he builds our character, strengthens our faith, and prepares us to help others."He gives us what we can bear -- not too much, not too little. He knows what we need and He is here with us through it all. I take comfort that the God of the universe -- who hung the stars, who created the glaciers that carved the magnificent mountains, who numbered the thicky curly hairs on Ted's head -- knows all that is going on inside of Ted's body, too. We can rest in His loving kindness.
Master of the universe, Creator, King and Lord, we feel safe with you. We trust you each step of the way.