This is the writing of Thomas Howard (1935-2020), who also references George MacDonald (1824-1905), so you can see, it's been wrong a long time.
But this message, meaningfully sculpted and masterfully delivered in a podcast (A Counter-Culture of Grace: James 4:1-12) by Dr. Tim Keller, has grabbed me and held on since I heard it a week ago. In fact, it's so good, I've listened to it several times.
Howard explains there are two ways to live: "My life for yours" or "I am my own/my life for me." He says we have 100 opportunities every day to put others' needs first or to put our own needs first. He says the "My life for yours" principle is the only one on which any life at all is possible, and this is what builds strong and healthy community. I pray this for our divided community!
One of the best ways God teaches us humility is when we become parents. We have to lay down our lives for our children; we sacrifice sleep, convenience, freedoms -- all kinds of things because the baby now needs us. And this requires more from us through the years as they grow. This bond of love causes us to move from our self-focus to others-focus as we shape this new human to also be thoughtful of others.
But somewhere along the way we have become consumed with ourselves, what we need, what we want, how we're accepted, how we're coming across. We have been trained to look for social media affirmations. [These are my thoughts, because Keller crafted his message in 2010.]
Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it's thinking of yourself less. "It's not being focused on yourself because inside you are supremely confident of your own worth and that God is taking care of the circumstances in your life," Keller says. "We replace this self-concentration with humility, kindness, graciousness, deference, forgiveness and courage."
Keller does a great job of illustrating how community is created, along with defining in detail the marks of spiritual pride that is a community killer. The way to create a harmonious, live-giving community is to grow in humility. He says we can have this growing humility "to the degree we know these two things: 1) the enormity of God's love for you, and 2) the upside-down principle that's at the heart of the universe (those who humble themselves will be exalted, those who exalt themselves will be humbled, etc.)."
"If you lay down your life for God, for other people, 100 times a day, die to your own power, your own control, you will get your life back forever, safe and sound." He says it's at the heart of the universe and the heart of history because it was modeled first of all by the Trinity. "From the beginning of time the Father, Son and Holy Spirit were glorifying each other, deferring, loving, honoring..."
"Then, in Jesus Christ, we see 'my life for yours,' the ultimate humbling -- He comes to earth, leaving His glory behind to model the way for us. He took the penalty that you and I deserve for saying 'I am my own/my life for me' -- what is that penalty? Cosmic loneliness! On the cross Jesus got that loneliness."
Now, because of what Jesus Christ has done, Keller draws on John 17, where Jesus prays for His disciples and then for all believers... "the Father loves us even as He loves the Son."
"How much does the Father love the Son? That's what you get. That's how God looks at you," he concludes.
Keller says if you try to draw near to God (James 4:6-8), even imperfectly, if you try to humble yourself imperfectly, if you try to resist the devil imperfectly, He gives more grace (v. 6) and He'll draw near to you (v. 8).
This makes so much sense to me, and I can see it better now after doing a media fast recently. I need this, I need more of this, I need to be transformed this way!
This small blog post barely scratches the surface of such an important message, so I hope you will listen to Keller's full podcast (link in title above).
As James 4:10 says: Humble yourself before the Lord and He will lift you up.
Lord, I need to learn your upside-down principle from the inside out! Help me become more aware of those 100x/day opportunities. May we fully trust you to take care of the circumstances of life so we can follow your example of putting others before ourselves.
