Saturday, June 26, 2010

Every Parched Thing

You may have noticed, I've been having a dry spell. Blogging is one of my favorite things to do, yet my flowing words have come to a slow drip.

I haven't published in a few weeks, though "the experts" advise regular posts to keep the conversation going with loyal readers. I have started with an idea many times, only to have it dry up on me. Will it sound too preachy? self-righteous? judgmental? I don't want any of those things.

Maybe I've been too eager, putting too much emphasis on getting something accomplished, putting too much weight on a self-imposed deadline. Maybe I'm trying to run ahead of God. Trying to do, do, do, instead of just "be." I need to listen, I need to wait, I need more practice with abiding in Him.

If I break the "bloggers' rules" then so be it, but nothing comes before God -- not even a blog talking about the wonderful things God has done!

It's not about my effort, or my timetable -- it's not about what I DO to please God... I realize, once again, total dependence on Him is what's essential. From my every breath to my every creative thought to my direction on what's next. They're His messages, His words. I'm just the scribe privileged to write them on the page.

I got a great picture of total dependence a year ago in May when my husband and I visited seven national parks in Utah. We traveled many hundred miles through deserts with gorgeous rock formations of every hue and texture. The signs posted often warned about flash floods, though there was not a drop of water in sight! But, that's just the way life is in the desert. Water comes eventually, but you have to wait.

When the rains finally come, the water pours down the mountains and gushes through those dry gullies and every parched thing comes alive again! Every dependent creature praises the Lord!

Lord, You will pour water on the thirsty land and streams on the dry ground.
Isaiah 44:3 NIV) Let my roots reach to the water! (Job 29:19 NIV) Nothing matters more than unity and relationship with You. I look to You in total dependence. Thank you for teaching me more about abiding.

Monday, June 7, 2010

A Human Doing

It had been a particularly productive day and I was pleased with all the work I had accomplished. I got to cross so many items off my list, and completed some things that weren’t even on it.

My dear husband told me to sit next to him and take a break. "You are a human being, Love, not a human doing," he said.

I thought of one item that got carried over each time I made a new list. It was a project begun with several others who didn't give it much urgency at all. I had tried every way I knew to motivate them to act, but no one else made it the priority that I wanted to make it.

Reluctantly, I continued with the work, as best I could, without the help of the others. I felt driven to complete what had been started... even if it meant doing it alone.

Eventually, I was able to sit back and reflect on what I had painstakingly accomplished. It felt good, but I missed the satisfaction teamwork would have brought.

I imagined God saying to me, "(Martha, Martha), you are worried and upset about many things (Luke 10:41) . It's good what you have accomplished... But the emphasis isn't really on doing. It's not about productivity...

How did you treat the people you viewed as obstacles?"

Oh, Lord, forgive the taskmaster in me! I am concerned about many things -- and I do not eat the bread of idleness (Prov. 31:27 NIV), but let me never forget how important the people are! Please help me to model your great love and patience throughout all my interactions with others. Help me to more often make the choice that Mary did.