Saturday, September 21, 2013
I've had a few weeks of deep stress. I felt so out of my comfort zone with responsibilities that now are mine. My heart cried out to God day and night.
That sounds a lot like the Psalms, doesn't it? And, each day as I open the Psalms, I'm reminded that King David also experienced a lot of stress and anxiety, but that through every trial, he kept his focus on God's lovingkindness, His unfailing love. I too pray daily, "O Eternal, drench us with your endless love, even now as we wait for you." (Ps. 33:22 The Voice)
Of course, Jesus knew stress, too, and He knew waiting. The Bible says Jesus was troubled in spirit when He knew one of His disciples would betray Him. When He prayed in the garden of Gethsemane, His soul was "overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death." Clearly Jesus knew every emotion we could ever feel.
So, we may feel fear and anxiety, but we are not to dwell there. We are to abide in our great God, focusing on His unfailing love. Psalm 33 also says, "We live with hope in the Eternal. We wait for Him, for He is our divine help, our impenetrable shield. Our hearts erupt with joy in Him because we trust in His holy name." (Ps. 20-21)
I truly have moments where my heart erupts with joy as I see how God is answering my prayers. While I no longer have Ted and all the wonderful things we had together, God has sent amazingly thoughtful people to walk with me through this sometimes dark and foggy valley. Each beautiful person reaches out and meets a different need (listening, companionship, prayer, encouragement, physical help and expertise, confidence, comfort and love). Each one is an unmistakable representation of God's lovingkindness in my life.
It will take me a lifetime to pay forward all the beautiful kindnesses that people have blessed me with these last months. But what a good goal that is to have!
Walking through grief or other struggles of life can be heart-wrenching, to be sure. But God's amazing grace and unfailing love abound every single day, if we keep our senses tuned to recognizing it.
Lord, you are all powerful, all knowing and your love is truly endless. Thank you for drenching me in your love! May God richly bless every dear person who is blessing me and loving me so well.